Wow! After reading this quick article, I absolutely feel so much better! Give yourself permission to STOP doing these things!!!!
By Kristie Blankenship at SelfGrowth.com
You can also read this post on The Empower Network!
There are some things in our lives that we just need to stop doing. They aren't good for us and they mess with our mindset.
I don't know about you, but I have found that some things I have done for so long that I just do them without thinking. Yet, some of those same things are just ruts that we get in and can't get out of. A lot of them are about how we think about things.
Here is a list of 7 things that we could SO do without!
1. Over-thinking things.
How many times do you find yourself fixated on some thought or idea and you've thought about it so much that you have it totally out there like in fantasy world or something or get so worked up about something because you've imagined all sorts of imaginary happenings? Stop thinking so hard. I know this is one area I'm really needing to work on some more because the way I'm made up I tend to think and think and think about things. Thinking about things is good, but only if you keep it balanced. Don't over think things.
2. Stuff my feelings.
There are different ways we all deal with our feelings. One way is we don't express them and just stuff them down inside. While it may be appropriate sometimes to not express our feelings and emotions, always stuffing them down inside without letting them out and expressing them is not healthy in more ways than one. When we stuff different emotions down inside and don't deal with them or express them or handle them, we are asking for trouble. This causes stress to build up, which we all know causes so many illnesses in itself. Without going into a lot of detail, for the purpose of this article, let's just say that we all need to express our emotions in a healthy way. If you need to cry, just do it. Don't feel ashamed because you feel however you feel. Emotions are just emotions. What you do with those emotions is what counts. Choose to deal with them in a healthy way.
3. Filling up all your time slots-juggling too many things at once.
Okay. So, I imagine we've all been guilty of this -- being WAY too busy. Do you fill up all your time slots on your calendar with stuff that keeps you so busy you have no time to relax? Stop. Breathe. I know we all have responsibilities and things we have to do to keep things going, but there is a point when too much is just too much! Let some of it go. If you really want peace and happiness in your life, you have to find more time for yourself and spending time doing the things you love and being with those you love to be around. Juggling too many things does nothing but keep you run down all the time, stressed out, and feeling like you never can get it all done. Believe me when I say that the more simple your life is the more peaceful you will be. So, slow down friend!
4. Tolerating stuff from other people.
We all have a personal space around us that we don't like anyone to cross. The closer we are to someone usually the closer we let them in. That being said, there are some things that we just shouldn't tolerate at all and sometimes we have to set boundaries. I have had to do this in my own life. There are some things I absolutely won't discuss with certain people. I know I'm not going to change their mind and all it does is upset me when we have certain conversations. I let them know I won't discuss it and if they insist, I leave. I refuse to stand there and listen to someone criticize me and talk down to me or go on and on about how they disagree with my decisions or actions. There are some things we have to take a stand for. If someone is always making you feel bad every time you get around them, either set some boundaries with them and gently let them know you won't put up with it or get some new friends. Respect yourself enough to stand up for yourself. Yes, you may have made some mistakes in the past, but you don't have to listen to anyone harp on them every time you see them. You will find yourself a lot happier if you hang out with those who lift you up, inspire you to do great things, encourage you, and make you happy!
5. Creating or tolerating drama.
I hate drama! I know a lot of people that can't survive without always causing drama or being involved with someone else's drama. Why would I want all the stress it brings? I can't stand being in a conflict with someone let alone being involved in their drama. If you are involved in creating or tolerating drama, you aren't going to find any peace. Most of the time, all drama does is accuse, point fingers, exaggerate, and make people feel bad. I find that drama is never uplifting to anyone. Just remember this, what you reap you will sow. If you create drama about others, more than likely others will be creating drama about you.
6. Trying to change people.
I know I have been guilty of this one. Why do we try to change people anyway? Is it because we don't appreciate them for who they are? maybe don't like something they do or the way they act? We are all different. None of us are the same. You do realize don't you that you aren't perfect either? I'm sure there are things about you they aren't that crazy about either. Let's just give everyone the benefit of the doubt and accept them for who they are. Give each other a little space. We are attracted to people and like them and don't really always know why; we just like them. When we start faultfinding and nitpicking, we are damaging the relationship and not enjoying the uniqueness of the other person. Just enjoy one another in all their glory. Each one of us should be able to be our true selves and not try to fit the mold of what someone else thinks we should be. You are unique yourself. You are special. Just remember, so are they.
7. Own other people's problems!
Raise your hand if you don't have any problems of your own. No hands? Imagine that! What we have to realize is that we have our own problems, which are enough for us to handle. Yes, we always look for a way to help our children or loved ones or friends when they have a problem. This is normal. This is love. Where it begins to be a problem is when we start to "own" their problems. Don't become so engrossed in other people's problems that you get stressed out, ill, find yourself thinking about it nonstop, and basically have unknowingly placed yourself right in the midst of the problem when you don't need to be there. This is their problem. You might be able to help or might not. Step back and let them handle it. If they ask for your help, don't over obligate yourself. Help in any way you feel comfortable, but remember that the other person will only grow if they learn to handle their own problems. Always bailing your kids out when they need money? "Oh, but mom or dad, the phone will be cut off if I don't have the money today!" I have given in to this one countless times (I have 5 kids), but eventually you realize they aren't learning the lesson of blowing their bill money and then suffering the consequences! This is just an example, but it is a hard one to learn when we just want to help them. They are grown ups now. Let them learn what they need to learn. If this example didn't resonate with you, just remember this: You aren't doing yourself or them any good if you are letting yourself get involved in their problems when it is not appropriate.
These are just 7 things we need to stop doing forever. Can you imagine how many there really are? This is a good start though! If we conquer these 7 things we are coming along and will feel better about ourselves and find more peace.
About the Author:
Kristie Blankenship is a happy entrepreneur, wife, mother, and grandmother who loves blogging and sharing her day to day life in her blog. Feel free to come by and say hi at http://www.athomewithkristie.com